Caregiver burnout: Learn the signs and how to find balance again
A recent AARP report found that family caregivers provided $600 billion in unpaid care across the U.S. in 2021. This is based on 38 million caregivers who provided an average of 18 hours of care per week, at an average value of $16.59 per hour – and it’s more than the $433 billion families nationwide spent in the same year for all out-of-pocket healthcare costs.
Caregiving has become a way of life for many families. Unfortunately, while attempting to balance work, childcare and other responsibilities with the need to take care of a loved one, it’s easy to experience caregiver burnout.
It may seem taboo to even discuss caregiver burnout. After all, aren’t we supposed to take care of our loved ones?
For an aging parent who needs care, isn’t it our turn to ensure their needs are met and that they have the highest quality of life, just like they did for us throughout our lives? Same thing with a spouse, sibling or other loved one who is not capable of taking care of all their own needs. Shouldn’t we be focused on them?
While at its heart caregiving is a positive endeavor – and there can be many benefits, such as being able to spend more quality time with your loved one – when you neglect your own needs it can affect you and the quality of care.
Recognize the signs
Exhaustion: An overall lack of energy, overwhelming fatigue
Change in sleep patterns: Either too little or too much
Food issues: Changes in appetite or eating habits, and weight gain or loss
Physical problems: Stomachaches, headaches and getting sick more often
Social withdrawal: Losing interest in activities that you enjoy, withdrawing from friends and family
Mental health: Feeling hopeless, lowered self-esteem, becoming irritable with or neglecting your loved one or others, mood swings, depression and anxiety
Find balance again
Recognize your limits (and don’t beat yourself up about it): We all have the same 24 hours in a day, and it’s easy to create a long list and just try to push yourself to do everything on it. But everyone eventually crashes, so set realistic goals.
Stay connected (and own your feelings): This includes keeping in touch with family and friends. Guilt is a common problem for caregivers, but getting angry or frustrated is a natural part of burnout, and venting to a trusted source can help. Also look for area support groups that can help connect you with others who are experiencing the same caregiver burnout challenges, as well as other community caregiving resources.
Ask for help (and accept it): You don’t have to do everything on your own. It can be hard to relinquish control, especially if you’re used to being the only family caregiver. However, from food prep and errands to driving your loved one to doctor appointments, there are any number of things that can be passed off. Make a list of tasks, both small and large, that could be delegated.
Make time for yourself (and enjoy it, guilt-free): As you’re able to pass off more tasks, use some of this free time for yourself. This can be as simple as spending an hour or two outside of the house shopping, having coffee with a friend or reading in the park.
Focus on your health (and mental health): Follow a healthy lifestyle, including good nutrition and drinking plenty of water. Exercise is also key. The endorphins released during physical activity are a natural mood booster. And ensure you’re getting enough sleep. Talk to your doctor if you’re having any sleep issues or other health symptoms, and consider meeting with a therapist, social worker or clergy member to talk about any caregiving challenges.
The importance of estate planning
While caregiver burnout is a challenge for many families, these issues can be amplified when the related legal aspects haven’t been resolved. Estate planning tools, such as a power of attorney, trusts or advance directives can help to provide more control and peace of mind for everyone, so you and your family can focus on caregiving.
When navigating this process, an experienced estate planning attorney can help you determine all of your family’s potential needs, explore alternative caregiving funding options such as Medicaid and direct you to other caregiving resources.
Call (810) 207-6670 or complete our online form to request a free phone consultation.
Buzz Suuppi
Buzz started The Plan Firm for his family, which is everything to him. Every member of his team is committed to providing effective estate planning and related solutions for families in St. Clair County, Michigan.